For the past hundred years or so, “modern art” has changed the boundaries of what is considered beautiful. By a mile. Now, we are no art experts, but we know what we like – and we do not like these paintings. They might have been sold for millions and millions of dollars, but money can’t buy taste. Just sayin’.
The lure of owning an original work by a famous artist, however, outweighs the price … and, uh, any logic for some people.
Who ever said the art world made sense? The following paintings are worth an amazing amount of cash, but we don’t think they should be – all the more fun to pick them apart as self-appointed critics.
- Mark Rothko’s No 1
We’re not sure why the artist even created this painting, which consists of nothing more than three variously colored boxes on a reddish background. Is this not the kind of work that kindergarteners do after snack time? Blue rectangle. Check. Orangey-red rectangle. Check. And throw a pink rectangle in for good measure. Great. You’re done! You know one of your shapes! Now you graduate to first grade! Parents, take note: This means, of course, that even your young children could earn you the $75.1 million this piece sold for.
- Willem de Kooning’s Woman III
You’ll be happy to know that your kindergartener can move beyond painting mere rectangles and graduate to painting human(oid) figures. Kooning’s female(ish) figure does look like the more mature work of a five- or six-year-old. Some will say that a young child could definitely do a better job of capturing the essence of a feminine figure than Kooning, who was around 50 when he painted it. We wonder what he was on, and whether he had impaired eyesight. Still, the work is worth more than $137 million. That’s enough cash to offer free eyeglasses to the populations of multiple small countries. Any recipient whose sight is restored shouldn’t look at the painting, though. Also, we wonder what women I and II look like.
- False Start, by Jasper Johns
“False Start” appears to be a very fitting title. This painting looks as if it was done by a grade school child who was still asking a fit of questions regarding names of colors, aspects of design, and when snack time is. The word “white” is painted in red, and the word “orange” is stenciled in white. It also looks as if the artist painted a number of blue and dirty-white handkerchiefs randomly hanging off the canvas – perhaps after wiping his or her nose repeatedly. Nonetheless, this piece sold for $80 million. Johns would merely call us peasants for not appreciating it.
- Jackson Pollock’s No.5
What list of incomprehensible art would be complete without Jackson Pollock? He is the quintessential doodler. His action painting technique of dripping, dropping, pouring, and dabbing created giant finger-painting-like canvases. Recall the art projects you did when you were young; Pollock was your subconscious idol back then. Some people believe the piece looks like a bird’s nest. Others say it more resembles a housepainter’s drop cloth after he has finished an entire Victorian house multiple clashing colors. Regardless, this painting, one of Pollock’s most famous, went for $140 million. Housepainters, you could make a mint if you save your refuse.
And once you or your wunderkind is done making wonderful art, you’ll need a way to clean yourselves off. Especially if you paint like Pollock. Bath and Body Works has everything soap you could possibly need. Make sure to check out Bath and Body Works Coupons from Groupon Coupons today!